stop

turn off your phone

close your eyes, stop crying

stop ripping yourself to shreds

‘cause you don’t know what else to do

stop

and remember

trace the lines of scars

against the patterns of your fingertips

guitar-string calluses 

and ink on your palms

do you remember what it felt like

when everything went wrong?

do you remember

how the night air felt 

against your tiny lungs

do you remember thrift store dresses

and curly brown hair on the floor

remember when it started

on your bedroom floor

when you wrote until you couldn’t 

keep bleeding anymore

do you remember free-falling off the breaking point

and crashing down into the shore

where the butterflies with fifty eyes

stitched you back together

do you remember

when you didn’t know

remember when you didn’t care?

about collateral damage

before you looked in the mirror and felt like a sculpture

before your world was set ablaze

do you remember when you were little

and crawled into the driver’s seat

pretending you could steer

when city lights were beautiful

all the way down here?

do you remember when it started?

on a beat-up green couch

think it was 2pm, give or take

i thought i could leave the whole world behind

quiet in my wake