and so brush off the red flags with positive affirmations, and a flick of your finger. you’re being dramatic. it’s just human nature. and i don’t think you’re supposed to have something to live for.

pounding drumbeats, and angry music, and standing on the edge, and footsteps against cork floor. and what are you doing? you shouldn’t feel angry like this. shouldn’t be losing control like this, and please stop telling yourself there’s nothing you can do about it.

you did something wrong. and you deserve to be punished. clenched fists, and a churning stomach.

they did something wrong. and they deserve to face your wrath for it. fast breathing, and a throat sore from screaming.

and look at this hole you’ve dug yourself into. look at the fires you’ve lit, and the homes you’ve torn up from the ground, and good god. what have you done to yourself?

I wanted this poem to feel really jarring and, I don’t know, rhythmic? A little like a heavy metal song in poetry, if that makes any sense. I don’t really know where it came from, it was just an empty file on Google Docs I opened up at school and then a couple days later I wrote this just based off the file name. Of late, I haven’t really been struggling with anger like I have in the past–but, well, I’ve been in some pretty bad places in terms of anger, and I wanted to just try and write that out.

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